WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE COSMOS???!!!???

Ok my BFF, also known as Asian Eddy, was recently turned down for a job with the Sylvan School District.

Something must be out of alignment with the cosmic forces. A.E. is a very talented and caring person who is gifted with many outstanding abilities. How could she have been turned down for this position?

HHmmm. I have a theory.

I believe that the Daughter of Satan, otherwise known as the Conniving Egomaniac Narcicist, has somehow cast a spell of depression and chaos on all that she touches. This dark fiend must be stopped. Must be destroyed! Why did we ever get rid of the Witch Hunt?

Asian Eddy, I know that this is a rough break for you, but things will get better. You are a super person, and you deserve the best. And, if you need to go out drinking, I and someone we will call "Lydia" will be happy to go out with ya. After all, there has never been anything that a healthy alcoholic addiction could not cure :)